still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
