So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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