biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Never joke about your clitoris.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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