I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
