And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
