You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Randomize
