it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
