Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
