In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
