If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
