Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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