He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
we're making bets on your personal life
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
