Midget sex pt 2 tonight
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
i would one night stand the shit outta him
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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