we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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