I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
