The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize