Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
