about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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