Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
