The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Randomize
