Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize
