apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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