Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
