i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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