i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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