please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
