thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
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