I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I want to stick my p in your. b.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Alive.
So much puke
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
