Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
