is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
