I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
