Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Just pee around me
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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