i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
