I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
