so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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