The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
