If i come over, it means nothing
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Randomize
