last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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