My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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