did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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