And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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