You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
