DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Randomize
