I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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