Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Randomize
