Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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