yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize