I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Randomize
