Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
