Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
